Everyone at some stage will face a funeral service, which regrettably become more regular with age; while not always the most pleasant and enjoyable experience for many, there are ways of making the event more bearable and memorable.
These include:-
● recognising that (unless asked specifically) nothing is expected of you, other than to show your respects by attending
● an appreciation that your attendance alone will be much welcomed by the family at such a challenging time; you do not need to have, or have shown, great religious fervour, for this to be the case
● not worrying too much about having to buy a brand new outfit for the event (unless you wish and can afford to). Dress codes for services nowadays are much more relaxed, though dark colours are still generally the order of the day unless your invitation or religious practice dictate otherwise
● after service events truly are optional. Its okay to see how you feel on the day and act accordingly; nobody ought take offence if you do not attend and if you do, nobody will expect you to carry, or be the life and soul of, the after event
● expect to feel emotional - services are a timely reminder of our own mortality as well as loss of the deceased; this can be a periodical catalyst for positive change in ourselves if we permit it to be; and listen to the service, as not only might that help it pass bearably, but you might learn something that you were perhaps not aware of about the deceased or learn a bit more about yourself from the readings, regardless of religious persuasion
● equally, it is fine to feel overwhelmed; advance hydration can assist this (though not so much as you have to cross your legs at the service owing to a need for the necessary!); as may some of the techniques contained in previous posts, the links to which are provided below:-
"Stressbusting™ Techniques to Manage & Calm Overwhelm"
"Using Grief as a positive Self Improvement tool"
We hope these ideas help at what can be a stressful time.
MikeyM™&LouLoU™ 🙏🧡💛💕🙏 xxxx